


Chicken Fight (AKA Frank's drunk and in a pool)

by SheSaysInParantheses



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Crack, Frank and Gerard aren't actually dating, Frank's just gay for the dude, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Pining, Ray needs a hug, Underage Drinking, WAIT ray needs a RAYse haha, franks also drunk, gerards a cutie lets be real, im so sorry, ray is such a mom, ray needs a raise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-12
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 07:14:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22680064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SheSaysInParantheses/pseuds/SheSaysInParantheses
Summary: Okay, are you seriously gonna sit there and tell me Frank wouldn't start a chicken fight at a party that had a pool?Frank gets drunk and decides to start a chicken fight.(Crack fic, if you couldn't tell.)
Relationships: Frank Iero/Gerard Way
Comments: 2
Kudos: 21





	Chicken Fight (AKA Frank's drunk and in a pool)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [genderfluidslytherin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/genderfluidslytherin/gifts).



> Ah yes, remi's back at it again getting me to post shit. This is what I do instead of sleeping.  
> I'm so sorry.

"I dunno, man. Maybe now's your chance to move on, y'know? Get over Gerard, find someone else to crush on. Or like, take a break from liking people." Ray looks over at Frank from the corner of his eye. "Y'know?" 

Frank takes a pull from the cigarette and flicks away the excess ashes. "I mean, I guess."

"But," Ray whirls, wagging a finger at his shorter friend. "This does not mean you should go and hook up with every guy you see to make you feel better."

"Should I start paying you for these therapy sessions, oh insightful one?"

The taller of the two rolls his eyes and pushes off the wall. "Just sayin'."

"You're always just sayin', Ray."

\--

Frank wanders out to the backyard of the house, where the pool is, beer in hand. He doesn't really know if he wants to get in until he spots a familiar head of red hair. He takes off his shirt haphazardly and cannonballs on in.

This very Frank entrance gains the attention of a few other stragglers who soon follow suit. It also gains the attention of Gerard (which was kinda the point), who's standing awkwardly in the deep end, talking to a random dude. The redhead sends his friend a look and mouths 'save me,' and what can Frank do but help? (Because fuck Ray and his advice to get over Gerard.)

So, of course, he takes the most logical course of action: cause some fucking commotion.

Gerard stumbles a bit as Frank jumps on his back, but he manages to remain standing. (Frank refuses to think about the fact that Gerard is shirtless, and Frank is currently on his back. Nope. Not thinking about it.) "Frank, what the-"

"WAIT! Oh my god, I have the best idea. EVERYBODY! Who wants to fucking chicken fight?!" 

There are a few whoops as drunk teenagers scramble onto their equally drunken friends' shoulders, because, for some reason, this sounds like a fantastic idea. 

The guy who was talking to Gerard looks extremely confused, to which Frank smirks. He's clearly new. He'll probably get used to chaos eventually.

"Dude, are you, like, 5 years old?" Gerard asks.

"C'mon, don't be a killjoy! Let's chicken fight!"

Gerard doesn't seem convinced, so Frank leans over his shoulder to give him big puppy dog eyes.

"Pwease?" he even bats his eyelashes for extra effect. 

"God, you're such a dork." (Like Gerard isn't one too.)

Frank doesn't even have time to be mock-offended before Gerard charges at an unsuspecting Brendon, who's sitting on the shoulders of Dallon. They're both freakishly tall, but they're also freakishly skinny, which, paired with the surprise on Frank's side, would be their downfall.

Literally.

Brendon's down quicker than he can scream, but he emerges from the water determined and enraged. 

"Oh, it's  _ on,  _ Rat Boy."

And then all hell breaks loose. Teens yelling and screaming and squealing either push others into the water or get pushed themselves. There are no boundaries to the drunk youth, Frank quickly learns- splashes blind the bottom half of the towers, people's hair is getting pulled, there's a large amount of kicking and punching, etc. etc. Frank's got water up his nose and in his ears, but he finds that he doesn't really care. 

(He's quite drunk, but we're not going to talk about it.)

Gerard's smiling big, which Frank calls a win.

(And the dude Gerard had been talking to earlier looks jealous, so: double-win.)

\--

"Man, that was the most fun I've had at a party since...I don't even know." Gerard finishes toweling off his hair and throws it at Frank, who's currently on the toilet drinking straight out of a bottle of orange juice that's one half cheap vodka. 

"I know, I'm a mastermind. Fun is my middle name. I'm a genius in the art of having fun. I'm like. The Van Gogh of fun." Frank stands up unsteadily, gesticulating wildly enough that Gerard has to duck to avoid getting hit in the face. "Oops! Sorryyy." Frank teeters a bit before the taller of the two grabs him by the shoulders. 

"How much did you drink?"

"Uhh. A lot. Ray says I need to stop drinking so much. Says it doesn't actually get rid of the feelings. But hey! Temporary is foreverrrr."

"That...makes no sense. Let's get you back to Ray, ok?"

"Nooo, he's gonna be all like," Frank straightens up in an attempt to look taller than 3 feet and puts his fists on hips. His face contorts into an oddly excellent impression of Ray's Mom Face™. "I told you not to get drunk, Frankie." Frank tsks and shakes his head. 

Gerard snorts, which makes Frank perk up and laugh. "Aw, you're such a cutie!" the short gnome of a man squishes Gerard's cheeks, causing him to flush.

"We're going to Ray, c'mon."

"Whatever you say, cutie."

"I am not a cutie." Gerard steers Frank out of the bathroom and tries to navigate the crowded hall. 

"Sure you aren't, Gee."

"Oh, shush."

" _ You _ shush!"

"No, you!"

"NO, you!"

"Oh god, please don't start this again." Ray appears out of nowhere in pure mom fashion. He looks as though he's reliving flashbacks from when his two idiot friends went back and forth like that for 30 minutes.

Yes, you read correctly. They sat around for 30 minutes like a middle school couple from the 80s saying 'no, you.'

Ray needs a fucking raise.

(Ray needs to get fucking paid in the first place.)

"Let's just get you guys home." Ray picks up Frank effortlessly, carrying him out the front door because lord knows he can't walk by himself.

"Whatever you say, mother dearest!" 

"Shut up, rat-face."

"You first, Princess  _ Fro-Fro. _ "

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, Frankie! That is too far! Apologize to the hair." Mom Number 2 (Gerard) looks very disappointed in Frank, so he does as told.

"I'm sorry, Ray's afro."

"She accepts your apology."

"Yay! Can we go home now?"

**Author's Note:**

> I mean, do whatever you want, but I'd love it if you left kudos or a comment! 
> 
> Also, let's start a petition to get Ray a raise, who's in?
> 
> xxstella


End file.
